It’s fortunate my mom has a grand sense of adventure because foot surgery is not for the faint of heart, especially, and including, the caregiver(s).
I learned to walk using crutches. Then a walking cast. It was a momentous day when 18 days post surgery I reached the bottom of my parents’ driveway. Checking the mail has never been so exciting. Mom learned the art of city driving and how to find and claim a parking spot on the street. She also figured out how to use a pedestrian in the crosswalk as a means of blocking traffic so she could make a turn.
I learned how to be patient, how to be dependent, and how to ask for help. Those were tough lessons. Mom learned my kitchen, my front staircase, my back staircase, the laundry machines in the basement, my neighborhood.
I learned the angles of my studio apartment and the places crutches could fit and how not to rest them against the doorway because they’ll crash onto the floor and at 3am it’ll sound like a gun shot and what my bed feels like after 23 hours in it. Mom learned the contents of my “pantry” and my fridge and could whip up a meal or snack to satisfy her pain addled daughter.
I learned how to install two different DVD players. Mom learned how to install a new toilet seat. Which she did like a boss!
Mom learned how to eat at the bar. And how to order a drink not on the menu. And how to turn down a free drink and then be told it’s on the house. I learned I can still drive because my right foot is healthy. It’s my left that (was) encased in the cast / walking cast.
I learned how important physical and mental balance are. Everyone had to walk on eggshells around my physical immobility and emotional instability. That lesson re: patience came in handy here. Mom had many of her own questions about my recovery, the prognosis, and the eye glasses my doctor was wearing when he removed the stitches. He was quite chatty during that appointment.
Mom: That was nice of him to share so much about his travels.
Me: I thought it was a bit much.
Mom: I mean it was kind of him to spend so much time with you.
Me: It’s probably because he has a crush on you.
Mom: *laughs* If you say so. I thought it was cute you instructed him to give you bad news so I’d stay longer.
It’s true. This was the one time I wished for bad news so there’d be a reason for Mom to stick around and have more adventures.
Abigail Mumford 