Tag: family

feelings

advice

abby mumford

me: the options are a cortisone shot or for the doctor to go in and remove the chip. i refuse to have more surgery. refuse! so, the shot’s my only option at this point. could you tell me about your experience?

him: cortisone shot, huh? i’ve had worse pain and it made my knees 80% better by the next day. i can feel it wearing off, sure, but i walked all the way around the neighborhood yesterday. it was definitely worth it. people say it’s up there on the pain scale, but for me, it was like a 6.

me: is it the needle or the fluid going in that’s the bad part?

him: the fluid and well, also the needle, but remember with my knees, the needle is a lot longer than what would be used on your toe.

me: i still can’t believe i re-injured myself. UGH. i’m so stupid. this is so so frustrating. sooooo frustrating.

him: you have to forgive yourself.

last night i ran for 15 minutes. slowly. painfully. it was the longest/furthest i’d gone since my foot surgery six months ago. each step radiated needles and concrete and bright pain through my toe across the ball of my foot down through the arch and up to my knee, but, each step was one closer to forgiveness.

feelings

halloween

abby mumford

two sundays ago, i discovered baby mac had reached the age where hiding from my weekly sunday FaceTime was more fun than actually talking to me. WHAT IS THIS, i thought. SHE’S ONLY 4. i’m supposed to be a fun aunt until, well, hell, until always. aunts are always the fun ones. it’s the moms that bear the full brunt of the teenage hormones (sorry, sister J) (and S-I-L M). she and bubba mac continued their game of hide and stay hidden, so sister J and i caught up instead. it was a rare treat talking like adults instead of filling in the blanks of the mad libs kids’ conversation.

last sunday, i came prepared. if baby mac was going to act like a teenager, i was going to get teenage advice from her. she danced around the room, a tiny ballerina on my phone screen. she plopped down next to her brother. she tore through the kitchen asking for something sweet. “hey, K,” i shouted. i waited until her face filled the view and then i unleashed the secret weapon, “what should i be for halloween?” she froze. her eyes grew pumpkin sized. her grin, a jack-o-lantern.

“i don’t know,” came tumbling through her teeth. her usual response. she looked towards her mom.

sister J prodded her, guided her, mothered her.

“a witch,” K said and looked right at me.

this sunday, i’m going to show her my costume.

feelings

secret santa

abby mumford

giving gifts is not something i take lightly. in fact, it’s quite an exhausting endeavor because in order for me to give a gift, it has to be good. it has to be meaningful. it has to make sense for the receiver. no generic stuff here. and so, yes, i find christmas to be a bit overwhelming with all the gifts i have to give at once, which is why i usually start planning what gifts i’ll give in october. that way i don’t have to rush and i can give each person not only the right gift, but a proper amount of time to figure out what said gift should be.

i’m in charge of organizing the sibling secret santa and doing so now means i’m just like all those major retailers who start decorating their stores mid-october. hopefully in a less annoying and bling-ed out manner. pumpkins and elves. the mash-up of holidays. family interlaced throughout. always family. always love. always laughter. always lucky.

i’m too liberal with my comma use. i use them to imply pauses, breaths taken. screw grammar. i’m living life on my own terms.

feelings

tuesday

abby mumford

it’s tuesday, but at noon, i’d only had two sips of my coffee and by three, i finally made it upstairs to grab my lunch. it might as well have been a monday.

sister E texted: “how have we not spoken since september?” i cringed at the day job work and school work and life work piled around me. it’s no excuse, but it is the reason. one of her favorite authors was speaking at my favorite local bookstore and books are our love language and i wanted nothing more than to go and take notes for her, but instead, i had to go and take notes at class. we settled for brief bursts of textual updates.

i called my grandmother after class, just like i do every tuesday. it was the first time i was still. my mind focused on bringing cheer to the call because that’s all she asks of me. that and to come out to CO for a visit. her voice crackles. i’m not sure if it’s the connection or her 93 years. she blames the “blasted phone.” every time.

“can you see the moon?” maga says. “it’s a great, big, full one tonight.”

i’ll sleep well tonight knowing we’re all tucked in under it.

feelings

thank you notes

abby mumford

this arrived in the mail the other day:

MMM thank you

and it’s the coolest thing ever for so many reasons.

(1) my niece signed her name as MMM. we (me + my family members) often use her initials when texting and emailing because it’s faster and shorter than typing her full name, but the fact she’s now using it as her signature? so cool! so grown up!

(2) the excess of O’s in the word so remind me that’s she’s 11 and i don’t have to worry about her being tooooooooooooo grown up.

(3) she finished a book in a week!

(4) her brother is bugging her to read faster so he has something to read.

(5) she lets her brother’s desires motivate and monitor her own habits, which shows what an amazing and gentle and sensitive big sister she is.

(6) they’re like me, in that, as a friend recently said about me to me, “you eat books for breakfast.”

(7) the letter was also the envelope, aka, it was a complicated and fancy folding job by MMM.

(8) handwritten thank you notes are one of my favorite things in the world (to write and to receive) and SILM and brother G have trained their kids well. in fact, i still have a postcard from when MMM was about 6 hanging on my fridge because her misspellings created the funniest note ever.

(9) i can feel the love all the way from the west coast.