Tag: friends

general

land line

abby mumford

i linked to this article in my last post, but it really stuck with me, this idea that if something happened to technology and all you could do is call your high school self, what would you say? i had put two up on twitter, but decided to elaborate today, because, why not? it’s fun!

dear HS self: you’ve reached your maximum height. stop dreaming. start living that pint sized life. or learn to love heels.

dear HS self: you know how you play sports 6x a week? you can enjoy that cake and have ice cream too. and chips. and soda. and seconds on everything.

dear HS self: don’t ever stop reading. or writing.

dear HS self: get a math tutor. it’ll quiet down those arguments with your (too smart) father.

dear HS self: those home cooked meals? appreciate them. your cooking doesn’t taste like that.

dear HS self: all that time you spent on the phone? it’s good practice for later in life when your friends are scattered all over the globe.

dear HS self: WEAR SUNSCREEN. or sit under an umbrella. it works. pale skin is better than red skin, especially since it’s pain free. promise.

dear HS self: tell E you like him WHEN you like him. don’t wait for him to make the first move. he’s just as shy as you are.

dear HS self: don’t have a girls’ night out at a club near the jersey shore. it doesn’t end well.

dear HS self: the blushing doesn’t ever go away. you should still speak up regardless.

what would YOU say to your HS self given the opportunity?

travel

released into the wild

abby mumford

i often think, feel, and act younger than my current age, but i (unintentionally) found a way of combating that: return to the college campus you attended as an undergrad. the town that saw you grow from 18-22. the ‘burg that bubbled around you, protected you, secluded you, enhanced you, taught you, fought you, encouraged you.

6 of us decided to have an impromptu reunion in harrisonburg. i use the term impromptu loosely because nothing really is spontaneous when you’re trying to plan a trip with 6 people who have full time jobs and hectic lives and responsibilities. why go back to the ‘burg? yes, we may have spent more time out of college than in it. and we may be closer to 30 than 20. and we may not be carded anymore. and we may have our own healthcare. and we may pay all of our own bills. but we really aren’t that old, are we? we can still reclaim our youth, can’t we?

reality check. (transcribed for full effect).

BOY: birthday party. our apartment. saturday night.
JILL: my sister and her friends will be in town. we may swing by. we may not.
BOY: sister? friends? girls? they can come.
JILL hesitates, says: well, it’s my older sister and some of her friends.
BOY: how old?
JILL: they’re 28 and 29.
BOY: COUGARS!

we embraced this new label. we declared it the weekend of cougars. we knew that even if we are old by college standards, we still could and would relive our glory days. we stayed at an off campus apartment. we visited all of the usual hot spots. we hit up some new restaurants. we showed 2 forms of id everywhere. we played pong. we won. we ate at the new dining hall. we toured campus. we thought about how lucky we were to go here. we ate. we pointed out new buildings. we took pictures of the old. we reminisced. we laughed. we ate. we told tour groups to pick this school. we bought new paraphernalia. we drank. we shivered and froze. (WTC, virigina. it’s march. i expect sunshine and daisies.) we marveled at the offerings. we talked about the changes the campus, and ourselves, have gone through. we ate. we were overwhelmed. we went to happy hour. we relaxed. we ate. we saw ghosts of our former selves. we waved. we cheers’d to 11 years of friendship. we filed away new memories.

and in the middle of all the “do you remember when”s, we accepted our transformation from duke dogs to cougars.

general

melting pot

abby mumford

america has been called a melting pot. which is true. all those people and languages and flavors and cultures and celebrations and traditions spicing up our country.

i’ve decided to be my own mini melting pot – to stew my own celebrations, brew my own beliefs, and cook my own culture. i will add new words to my vocabulary and traditions to my life. i will defy expectations and relish in the parts of me that are stereotypical. i will be a creature of habit and expand my boundaries. i will be my own individual and be a part of something larger.

the first tradition that i am going to embrace is a bulgarian one in honor of my friend and coworker, adriana. it’s a tradition i have been learning about for the past 2+ years and have (secretly) been wanting to partake in ever since i first heard about it. you see, bulgarians have a pagan ritual (called “Baba Marta“) to welcome spring. a bracelet (called a “martenitza“) of red and white yarn (the white symbolizes purity, and red symbolizes life) is tied onto your wrist and is worn from March 1 until you see a stork or blooming tree, at which point you tie it to a tree. what a lovely idea to cheer on spring’s arrival while waving bye bye bye to winter.

if you really think about it, it’s a genius idea to welcome spring with a celebration. it’ll probably be more apt to arrive sooner knowing that a celebration has begun. if i were spring, i wouldn’t want to miss out on the party, would you?

truth be told, i’m really hoping to see a stork and there’s a good chance i will see one in april. you know why? J’s preggers and we all know it’s the stork who brings the baby. OR maybe i’ll have to modify that part to fit into my american way of life. i do believe there will be flowers and trees popping out where i live. does a blooming onion count? maybe i’ll take my bracelet out on a date to Outback Steakhouse. woah, now there’s a clash of culture. ack. too much. too soon.

anyways, the real reason i decided to take part in this ritual this year is because adriana came to my office with my very own martenitza and ambushed me and tied me up. WOAH, totally kidding. we were at work. we’re always the utmost professionals. (she is anyways). she did tie the bracelet on me because, well, it’s sort of hard to tie a knot with one hand. you may be that talented, but i’m not. i look at the bracelet each day and smile because it’s a symbol that spring will come. that warm weather isn’t all that far away. that winter’s on its way out. that i am taking part in a centuries old tradition. that, for a month, i’m bulgarian (i can speak it too). that i need to be on the look out for flowers and storks. that i will see spring sooner if i’m looking closely enough. that i’m lucky enough to have a friend like adriana.

general

musical notes

abby mumford

some nights take you by surprise. they tap your left shoulder and come ’round the right. they jump out from behind the door. they take your expectations and throw them on a roller coaster – spinning and speeding and swirling until you’re not entirely sure which end is up.

thursday night was one of those nights.

my expectations were these: i was there to support Z in yet one another of his musical incantations (he was conduting a high school concert), but it was a high school concert nevertheless, there’d be some music and uncomfortable chairs.

the reality was this: walking into a high school after hours feels slightly forbidden and wrong, even if you’re no longer in high school and haven’t ever take any classes in this particular building. i sounded like a teacher walking down the hall in my (straight from work) high heels. there were 5 people in the audience i knew, none on stage (except Z). 2 of those 5 were visiting from australia, which is the original reason i decided to go. i was ready to cheer for Z as he conducted one of the nine songs of the night.

the kids, all in matching white shirts and black pants/skirts, filed onto the stage. they giggled and whispered and set up their music. the awkwardness was palpable. i said a quick “thank you” for no longer being that age. i got out my pen to take notes on said awkwardness because i am, after all, working on a story about middle schoolers – prime awkward age. the conductor raiser her arms, the students raised their instruments and i wondered again how i came to be here.

all at once, the violins began to make music and i stopped wondering about life and took a deep breath. the music filled the room. everything was in unison – their clothes, their elbows, their arms, their fingers, their tapping toes, their backs straight, sitting at the edge of their seats. but it was the transformation from bumbling teenager to accomplished musician that was so astonishing. they were in charge of the room. they were leading us. they were showing us their talents. they knew, without question, what they were doing.

i thought i was there to watch (one of) the conductor(s), but it was the kids who captured my attention.

the music caught me off guard. it was gorgeous, both auditorally and visually. i was reminded just how different live music can be. the crisp sound. the way the arm moves. the focus on their faces. the delicate placement of the fingers. i may be tone deaf, but i know those kids are talented and it was impressive. they were no longer awkward, but confident. no longer giggling, but serious. no longer young, but old.

i found myself sitting at the edge of my seat. trying to get closer to the music. trying to touch their talent. trying to learn how to look like an adult when you’re not quite there yet yourself.

feelings

gratitude

abby mumford

i’ve always been a big believer in saying thank you. it doesn’t matter if someone handed you something you asked for or gave you enough money to cover your student loan or they simply gave you work materials on time, i always take the time to say thanks a bunch. thank you. thanks so much. it might be because my mom always made me write thank you notes after christmas and my birthday and so i got used to acknowledging someone when they did something for me and so the expression of my gratitude became habit. or it might be because i like how i feel when someone thanks me, so i’m just trying to return the favor. or maybe it’s a combination of both?

anyways, as i was catching up on my friend kristen’s blog (http://moodswingmusings.wordpress.com/), she had a post about the gratitude tree she had come across in July. there were little white tags all over the tree, each with a small statement of something that particular person was thankful for. she said “I liked stopping to think about the people and things that add value to my life. So every night before bed I repeated the action of recalling the one thing I wanted to remember about the day. I like to think it impacts how I sleep, how I wake, and the way I treat others I encounter throughout the next day.”  because her iphone can only hold so much, she decided to transfer her nightly musings to a new blog. i too really like (and support) this idea, so ever since i found out about it, i’ve been adding things i’m grateful for to the comments section. you can access her delicate and genius writing here:  http://thegratefulproject.wordpress.com/

in other news, i was recently turned onto podcasts, specifically oprah’s soul series, by erin. these podcasts have changed my life in so many ways. (1) instead of being bored with my music while i walk to work, my mind is being stimulated and educated and enlightened. (2) i don’t feel alone because i’ve got oprah and whoever she’s interviewing as company. (3) i’m learning A LOT about spirituality, something that’s always confused me, yet interested me too because how come my siblings get it and i don’t? (4) i’ve been learning about myself and my attitudes and how i can overcome particular shortfalls to be a better person.

so yesterday’s podcast was with sarah ban breathnach who wrote the book “simple abundance”. the main idea of the book is gratitude. when i heard them first talking about gratitude, i started to laugh out loud because this topic had just been introduced into my life through kristen and her blog. and when the same exact concept is told to me twice in one week? well, i think it’s time to take notice. i haven’t read the book yet (i just ordered it from amazon), so i don’t know too many of the details behind it. i’ll have to update you once i’ve had a chance to read it, but since this idea is just so gorgeous to me and since it’s the middle of the year and i’m now “behind” in writing down things every day, i thought i’d start off with 100 things i’m grateful for. and these are in no particular order:

(1) my family
(2) my friends
(3) my (stable) job
(4) my (stable) rent
(5) my bed
(6) falling asleep at night
(7) hitting the snooze button in the morning
(8) my box fan
(9) air conditioning
(10) sunshine and SPF and sunglasses
(11) the beach
(12) taking naps
(13) reading
(14) YA novels
(15) the authors who write those YA books so beautifully that it’s become much more widely accepted for adults to read YA.
(16) working in publishing
(17) my typing skills
(18) emails
(19) twitter
(20) the internet
(21) cell phone, which keeps me in contact with those who don’t live around the corner.
(22) laughing so hard you shake silently
(23) that fact that i’m surrounded by so many people who can make me laugh like that.
(24) my electric toothbrush
(25) my master’s degree
(26) myring that was once my aunt’s and once my great grandmother’s. it’s so fantastic to wear something everyday that has sparkled in the early 20th century sunshine.
(27) my mom’s (and now dad’s!) home cooked meals. i’ll gladly do the dishes if it means i don’t have to eat my own cooking.
(28) my car
(29) the independence my car affords me, even though i don’t take advantage of it all the time and even though i don’t always like that i have to do things on my own, it’s liberating to be able to.
(30) fruit
(31) chocolate milk
(32) pizza and salad
(33) walking to work, even though my hair is sometimes messed up, my clothes get rained on, or the sun makes me sweat, it’s the days inbetween when i don’t have to worry about traffic reports or snowy/icy roads or the temperatures are just right that make it so delightful to walk to work.
(34) my davis square apartment, while quaint (ahem, tiny), it was the best place to live while getting to know the city.
(35) my upcoming office move. while the recession is in full effect, it’s nice to have an office upgrade, especially since my salary is not.
(36) netflix
(37) ipod
(38) people who return my calls
(39) a big work bag, which fits everything and more.
(40) scarves, hats, mittens
(41) living in a city that is so sports obsessed.
(42) having access to both coaching and playing lacrosse. i can’t get enough of that sport.
(43) my work softball team
(44) the food network — without it, i’d be even more clueless in the kitchen.
(45) having the courage to do things that are scary or undesirable at first, but benefit me in the long run, as putting yourself into difficult situations makes you learn about yourself.
(46) conversations about nothing
(47) conversations about really important issues, concerns, and opinions.
(48) having the ability to really listen when a friend needs it and vice versa.
(49) having a newfound ability to speak up when i don’t agree with something.
(50) ice cream
(51) s’mores
(52) campfires
(53) bonfires
(54) a clear sky at night with no city, no buildings, no interruptions. just you and the sky.
(55) my big trampoline that lives at my parents’ house
(56) a grill
(57) steak tips from mckinnons
(58) a reason to grill, friends to grill with, a place to grill, and a patio/porch to eat on.
(59) front porches
(60) rocking chairs
(61) flashlights
(62) candles
(63) running water
(64) running shoes
(65) willpower to get up out of bed to run before work, before caffeine, before makeup.
(66) words
(67) GPS
(68) friends who don’t laugh at the dumb questions i ask.
(69) friends who will answer any question i ask with an honest answer.
(70) post-it notes
(71) chapstick
(72) lip gloss
(73) chewing gum
(74) bagels from the bagel club in NJ
(75) traveling to new places
(76) traveling to old places
(77) a familiar face in a crowded room
(78) earrings
(79) bracelets
(80) watches
(81) new ideas
(82) having a piece of paper to write those ideas on.
(83) having the support of people when i’m trying that new idea out.
(84) my bike
(85) the bike path
(86) my niece and nephews
(87) my siblings
(88) thanksgiving dinner
(89) the turkey trot
(90) warm family reunions
(91) feeling homesick because it means i have other places to go and i’ll still be loved.
(92) homemade mac and cheese
(93) funny emails
(94) night lights
(95) my imagination
(96) having so many gifted mathematicians in my family
(97) a bookmark
(98) tissues in the winter
(99) the pictures of family and friends that decorate my office
(100) this project.