Tag: tuesdays with maga

general

happy birthday, maga

abby mumford

maga turns 89 today.

*round of applause*

it’s a momentous occasion to be sure. one that deserves celebration, lots of candles, and even more cake. since i can’t be there in colorado with her, i figured the least i could do is list 89 reasons why she is so stellar. but before i do that, i’d like to direct you HERE. it’s slightly more serious and befitting of an 89th birthday.

and now, without further ado, 89 REASONS TO CHEER FOR MAGA.

(1) because she’s lived 89 incredible years.

(2) because she graduated from wellesley college, earning a degree when many women didn’t.

(3) because it wasn’t all work and no play. she knew how to have fun. by gathering up the girls and playing round after round of bridge.

(4) because she said “i am” when a girl friend asked who was free to go on a blind date with a boy from MIT.

(5) because that “i am” turned into an “i do” when the blind date turned out to be with one joseph searles bowman.

(6) because she moved to the west coast so she could be “closer” to jobo should he ever get leave from the war. (a leave was apparently quite short and they wanted to maximize their time together and it would have been severely diminished if she had a 3 day train ride from the east coast to the west.)

(7) because she didn’t know anyone on the west coast when she moved there. she moved there for love.

(8) because it’s a brave woman who can follow her heart like that.

(9) because it’s a strong and true love story that can withstand a war and unanticipated time apart.

(10) because she created a family and cherished them completely.

(11) because she has strong opinions.

(12) because she still puts on lipstick before leaving the house.

(13) because she is fragile and needs our love.

(14) because she still gets around town.

(15) because she loves dessert.

(16) because she still has pictures printed into hard copy form at her little photo shop down the street.

(17) because she can whip my butt at cards.

(18) because she instilled a love of card games in my mother, who then introduced them to her kids.

(19) because she has a hard time letting go of magazines and cards and trinkets and whatever else you can fit into a basement because what she really doesn’t want to let go of is the memories.

(20) because she took a deep breath and let J and i sort through her entire magazine collection and throw away almost 400 magazines.

(21) because she picked out a particular magazine to give to one of her “ladies” because she knew maria would get more enjoyment out of it than she would.

(22) because she has traveled the world; seen and experienced it all.

(23) because she took a house and turned it into a home.

(24) because she loves spending time with family.

(25) because she puts a smile on her face and makes it through another day.

(26) because she is grateful for the smallest gestures, like regular phone calls.

(27) because she loves gardenias.

(28) because she has more courage than she realizes.

(29) because she decorates her house with pictures of family.

(30) because she is interested in what you are saying.

(31) because, in the absence of jobo, she is holding onto her home.

(32) because she has so much left to teach us and share with us.

(33) because she likes to laugh as much as anyone else.

(34) because she is a good example for us.

(35) because she is embracing the detour life has given her.

(36) because she opens the doors to 353 ivy 365 days a year.

(37) because she still writes christmas cards.

(38) because she keeps the candy jar full of lemon drops.

(39) because she gets dressed up when the occasion presents itself.

(40) because she has a reason to get dressed up, which means she is keeping busy with an active social life.

(41) because she gets her hair done every week. (or so).

(42) because she has a computer in her house even though she has no idea how to use it.

(43) because she stands by her convictions.

(44) because she likes watching the olympics.

(45) because she is honest about how she is feeling.

(46) because over the course of a conversation, her voice can go from sad to happy.

(47) because she is continuing to live, and possibly even thrive, despite the passing of the love of her life.

(48) because she is an incredible role model.

(49) because she is stubborn.

(50) because she has all of these memories to share.

(51) because she shares them willingly.

(52) because her mind is as sharp as ever.

(53) because she loves to take pictures. the old fashioned way. with film. and have a store develop them for her.

(54) because her name is maga.

(55) because she is stronger than she even knows.

(56) because all she asks is that we visit her.

(57) because her laugh is infectious.

(58) because she would do anything for her family.

(59) because her heart is full of love for us.

(60) because her legacy is one of love, laughter, intelligence, and family.

(61) she has 12 grandchildren and 4.5* great grandchildren. (the .5 refers to J’s as yet to be born babe).

(62) because of greg.

(63) because of jane.

(64) because of jennifer.

(65) because of peter.

(66) because of me.

(67) because of heidi.

(68) because of emily.

(69) because of gib.

(70) because of caroline.

(71) because of anna.

(72) because of jack.

(73) because of joey.

(74) because of madeleine.

(75) because of aaron.

(76) because of liam.

(77) because of christian.

(78) because of baby girl mccarthy.

(79) because she’s happy when we’re happy.

(80) because she sends us a check on our birthday and again on christmas.

(81) because she sends us a $2 bill on valentine’s day.

(82) because she sends us handwritten cards.

(83) because she deserves to have the love she sends to us returned to her tenfold.

(84) because she generously shares access to the dillon condo, the dude ranch, the fishing spot, and cherry hills country club.

(85) because she answers the phone with a “hello, abby dear” and an excitement in her voice that can be felt from 2,000 miles away.

(86) because she teaches me something new every time i talk to her.

(87) because she is loyal.

(88) because she is adorable.

(89) because she is a survivor.

happy birthday, maga!

general

generations

abby mumford

i’ve always had long distance family which makes for some great reasons to travel, but doesn’t afford the type of relationship that develops if you are neighbors. fortunately though, i’ve gotten in the habit of talking with my grandmother, maga, once a week. it started after my beloved grandfather, jobo, passed away unexpectedly two years ago. they had been married for 65 years. jobo was the type of man who lit up a room with his personality. he was always joking, always laughing, always telling a story, always entertaining the guests while maga prepared the house and the food for everyone. as such, it turns out i knew jobo better than maga.

but through our weekly phone calls, i’ve come to learn a lot about this woman. she doesn’t express her love in the usual channels, but rather in constantly checking the weather where i am so that she can keep tabs on me by knowing what weather surrounds me. she willingly shares her memories of jobo, of life, of being a military wife, of love letters, of moving, of growing up. her mind is as sharp as ever but she still mixes up the names of her children and grandchildren. at the end of every call, she tells me that there is a place for me stay should i want to come out west for a visit. she wonders why she’s single. she sighs. she talks about her new surroundings — her caretakers and her weather out there in colorado, so that i can keep tabs on her knowing what and who she’s dealing with. she refuses to leave her home. she focuses every ounce of her attention on the phone call when we talk. i can feel her love.

my mother, on the other hand, is impossibly hard to pin down. when she does pick up the phone, she’s always doing something else while talking to you. she’s cleaning or fussing at my younger sister to get moving or wrapping presents or checking the internet or sorting through the mail. she rarely seems to have enough hours in the day to get everything done. she mixes our names up, her children and grandchildren, but mostly just sister E’s and mine. she is incredibly smart. street smart and book smart. she turns down working opportunities so that she can have time for us, be home for us, her children. she accepts school board positions and PTA presidentships and starts youth lacrosse programs so that our school and out-of-school environments will be better, solid, memorable. she works tirelessly and consistently and on days when she doesn’t feel like it so that we don’t want for anything other than for her to sit down, take a rest, relax. i can feel her love.

and then there is me. i am finding hints of maga in my actions and tendrils of my mother in my speeches. like maga, i wonder why i’m single. like my mother, i multi-task. like maga, i focus on phone calls and am confused by technology and write letters instead. like my mother, i volunteer my time in hopes of creating a better environment for those younger than me. like maga, i make sure my hair is done and my makeup is on before leaving the house because you never know who you’ll run into around town. like my mother, i dream of being a mother. like maga, i cherish our weekly chit chats because it’s soothing to hear a familiar voice on the other line telling you stories, teaching you manners, loving you from afar. like my mother, gratitude is all i expect for the things i do. like maga, i play cards. like my mother, i play cards. like maga, i don’t express love easily though i do love deeply. like my mother, i don’t like to cook, but will do so if necessary. like maga, i wish my family was closer. like my mother, i am glad i have wings.

i’ve heard people say in horror “i’m turning into my mother.” i can admit that the thought has crossed my mind before, but most of the time, i couldn’t be more thrilled to do so.