feelings

read me

in a fit of procrastination, i turn to the interwebs. and boy, oh boy did it respond. i’ve had no less than 3 “holy cow you MUST read this NOW” moments. between me, myself, my blog, and twitter.

this post articulates a fear i refused to acknowledge because as soon as i would hear it whispering, i’d shhhh it right quick. because it was too soon. because it was too silly. a fear, any fear doesn’t have to be rational, but it should be acknowledged and discussed because otherwise how would you move past it? fear as motivation. that doesn’t sound scary, does it?

this post sounds familiar. except add 4 years. subtract one PhD program. minus the cooking abilities. and remove the scientific brain.

(michael buble’s “i just haven’t met you yet” came on pandora just now. yes, yes, i know. patience is a virtue. on many levels.)

this post hit me over the head, knocked me down, and then kicked me. in a good way. i am, by nature, a private person. it’s deceiving because i will truthfully and completely answer any question asked of me, but when answering, i’m in control of what i say. and usually what i leave out is what i’m writing about. i keep it close because i’m a perfectionist and i don’t want anyone reading it until it’s perfect. and added to that,  i am superstitious (ish) so i won’t talk it until it’s ready to be read. vicious cycle, no?

i have made a few concessions, but that’s only been to people within the industry because they “know”. they “understand”. hannah makes the point that it’s the people who aren’t in the know that are most valuable because they will champion YOU instead of each contract point or print run quantity or release date or how fast you signed with an agent or if your book went to auction. which is true. oh so true. thanks for walloping me with that truth.

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