writing

writing through the wall (or writing 101)

i don’t know why or where or how i was under the impression that you only had to break through writer’s block just one time and that once you were through, it was all SUNSHINE and HAPPY THINGS and TRA LA LA LA LA all the time from your fingertips.

not so. oh, not so. you have to break through that wall EVERY. SINGLE. TIME you sit down to write.

EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

this post by jessica corra explains it all so much more eloquently, especially the part where she relates it to sports, specifically running. just because i hit 3 miles yesterday doesn’t mean that running today is going to be easy. i mean, it might. the weather might be cool and crisp and my legs might be fresh, but then again, the humidity might be solid and my legs could feel like that as well. who knows? all i know is that i have to push through and keep running because once i’m done that’s when i feel all ENDORPHINEY and SHINY and TRA LA LA LA LA LA and GOOD.

i want to get to that place from writing and the only way to do so is to finish. and to finish, i have to start. each day (or, you know, most days). word by word and sentence by sentence, the pages will fill up. sure, the rough draft is going to be icky and horrid and unfit for all human eyes (save my own), but that’s when the EDITING and POLISHING and SERIOUS WRITERLYISHNESS comes in.

getting that first draft down and out has been difficult for me. i’m not going to go all psychotherapist on myself to figure out why, but instead be grateful that i’ve stumbled into one bria quinlan who’s the funniest type of taskmaster. she’s getting me to put my butt in the chair (at the thinking cup and/or at california pizza kitchen and/or at my own house) and i’m writing. i really am. (look ma, no hands!) (wait…)

the other thing this fast drafting process has shown me is that i’m so busy working i don’t have time to sit and think, “hey, this is really bad and these characters all sound the same and the plot? what plot? and UGH, i stink and what’s dangling participle again?”

i’m just there in the moment writing.

like with running, i don’t have time to think, “hey, my arms aren’t swinging enough, my foot falls on its heel, do i look weird?” because i’m watching for traffic and deciding to go left or right and pushing forward and feeling how my lungs are doing.

i’m just there in the moment running.

it would appear that by just doing [said task], i’m able to push through that wall, which, for me, is composed (brick by brick) of self-doubt. your wall might be made of a different foundation, but the point is not what it’s made of. the point is not to give yourself time to think or worry or ponder, but to get around, over, under, through, past it any way you can.

and if you have trouble getting going, i think it’s okay to start by writing ON the wall.

general

book title poetry

janet reid (a literary agent) is hosting this crazy cool poetry contest and what with all the poetry i keep finding of late, i figured it was time i stopped avoiding all the signs and started writing some of my own. and what better way to start than with book titles? i only had to add 11 of my own words! and take a picture. so easy! so fun!

in fact, this was so enjoyable, i just may add this to my “get the creative juices flowing” exercises. they’re sort of like stretching (mentally) before a sprint/marathon session of exercising/writing.

THE DAUGHTER OF SMOKE AND BONE and
THE PRINCE OF THIEVES have a
FLASH BURNOUT
SUPERNATURALLY
FORBIDDEN
PERFECT CHEMISTRY.
AND THEN THINGS FALL APART
due to her BAD TASTE IN BOYS.
He’s GONE, leaving her with nothing but
THE PARTICULAR SADNESS OF LEMON CAKE.

how about your bookshelves? what poetry do they hold?

UPDATED: i was a finalist!!!! and i got a specific shout out!!!! check it out.

feelings, writing

believe

jeannie moon’s friend jolyse barnett left a comment on jeannie’s blog and it ended with a single, profound statement:

“Believe in yourself, and write what you love. Nothing’s more real than that.”

yup. this. do it.

and if you need to, replace the word “write” with what you do.

teach, learn, coach, cook, sing, create, draw, drive, run, swim, jog, say, bike, read, skate, sail, jump, climb, sleep, row, etc.

*big, squishy hug for you all*

go do something grand today.

feelings

familiar quotes

i was reading IMAGINARY GIRLS by nova ren suma when i came across this quote:

“…and our telephone voices were nearly indistinguishable, so she could pretend to be me or i could pretend to be her if we wanted to fool you into leaving a message.” pg.11

it describes sister E and i to a T. countless times i’ve answered the phone and the person on the other end will start talking to me as if i’m her and vice versa. we haven’t taken full advantage of it because the age gap between us means we haven’t lived under the same roof since 2003, but the next time i’m home for the holidays, i just may steal her cell phone…think of the prank calls i can make! *cackles*

and then i came across this passage and hello, sister J:

“[She] was a killer of a listener. The [girl] understood fragmented people.”
THE PIPER’S SON by melina marchetta, pg. 125

as for the eldest of the mumford children, brother G, well, this right here is him:

“He recalled Galloran stating that being a hero meant doing what was right regardless of the consequences.”
THE BEYONDERS by brandon mull, pg.420.

i don’t need to elaborate much because, well, brother G embodies everything that makes up a hero and it’s not just his kids who see him as super.

have you ever read anything that reminded you of someone you know?

feelings

new muse: SLAM POETRY

i don’t read much poetry and i don’t really write it either, but i have been to many slam poetry shows because there’s something so unique about the rhythm, the ebbs and flows, and the electricity created from words spoken aloud. there’s no accompanying music just the naked truth of the words themselves.

when done right, it’s stunning.

when one is in the middle of a writing drought, there’s nothing better than sitting in a room where words are being yelled, whispered, twisted, combined, formed, turned, beaten, caressed, produced, changed and revealed because they’ll sneak in through your ears and also through your heart.

boston hosted this year’s national poetry slam, which ran from august 9-13 and while i wasn’t as a dedicated viewer as adriana, i did attend the festivities one night. i was verbally assaulted in the best kind of way. watching these people stand and deliver whole words about broken experiences showed me what bravery really means.

it didn’t make me want to jump in front of a mic, per say, but it did make me want to pull out my paper and pen and be brave too.

there were a zillion lines i wanted to remember, but to write it down during the poet’s performance was to miss the other sizzling combinations of words, so i listened carefully and hoped my memory would ring true. (i’ve been eating a lot of blueberries this summer, which i hear is good for that sort of thing.) anyways, these poems are meant to be heard aloud and seen performed because not only does the sound of the voice affect the words, but the hands and the legs and the torso and the fingers and the feet. and let me tell you, these poets were performing the crap out of these pieces. from the tips of their tongues to the soles of their souls.

there were three poems that stood out to me, but i could only find one of the poems online (what, are poets from the 19th century?) and so the best i can offer is a cut and paste. for what it’s worth in this limited (read, not heard) capacity, enjoy.

omar holmon’s NEW WAYS TO SMILE

Things I know about this girl,
she is cuter then a panda bear deciding which end of a bamboo stick to eat first
and moves like the martyr of a high school dance floor,
The first sacrifice of care free, blooming life from hips and hair

While the best of us fake inanimate cool because we’re still too afraid of our own bodies
plus, I think she’s single cause when the DJ said “all single ladies make some noise”
I specifically remember her… making noise

Now what follows is a list of things I’m trying to bring myself to tell her
but can’t, yet have no problem telling a room full of strangers. . .

1
I don’t have a train of thought it’s more like thoughts running a train on random
I’m all quips and out of context statements, a nerd without a sound theory
but a strong hypothesis that you are scientific proof that there are still new ways to smile

2
My emotions can best be described
through obscure web comics and internet videos since pixels
capture in better quality what we can’t convey through words at the time

which now explains the youtube link I sent you
of two otters asleep holding hands drifting with the water current
it’s the way I say you got this nature that garners you in remarkable.

3
I’m going to need you to understand that if we see a superhero movie together
and it strays too far from the comic book it is my right as a fan to be upset
so if I’m like “why’d they kill Jazz in Transformers?
What even black robots die at the end of movies also?”

I need you to chime with an “I know right?
an what was with Christian Bale’s Batman voice?”
which in turn would lead us to discussing what he’d sound like
in the bat-mobile singing along to the radio

3a)(Batman Voice) “Hold on Rachel! …Umbrella-ella-ella-a”

4
This is could be classic like Boy Meets World, season 4 episode 17
Topanga Lawrence coming back 300 miles from
Pittsburg to Corey Matthews in Philadelphia

5
My mother has this barbwire in full bloom personality
I’m talking keyed a few cars in her day, unbreakable type status
But found her writhing on her back, like spiders before post mortem

eyes chasing constellations of voiceless echoes
her mind a two way mirror with the belief
that reality isn’t on the other side looking in.

When she got out the hospital I asked her if she saw Elvis
She still laughs at that, we all face our monsters differently
just because I smile while I do it doesn’t make me any less serious.

6
When my father was still the man he use to be
he’d drive 177 miles, 3 hours and 27 minutes to see my mother every weekend.

My sister found her husband 3,302 miles away in Singapore
While living in Tokyo, that’s a 55 hour drive
thru the Pacific Ocean floor or a 7hr plane ride…

Destiny has a history of making my blood line run the distance
so even though your window is 537 miles 8 hours and 21 minutes that way,
I want to stand outside of it even though I don’t know which one it is,
with a boom box over my head singing,

“Straight up now tell me do you really want to love me forever? Oh. Oh. Oh.”
and you’d be all “What are you doing its 2 o clock in the morning?”
but I’d be like, “What? I can’t here you over the sound of all this awesome!”

7
Roy Sullivan was a park ranger
that got struck by lightning seven times and lived
The human body is a beautiful conductor, our words hydrogen bond

I held your hand, felt every electron coursing the current
on the life line in your palm and had a flash forward of us looking back
discussing when we first met to smaller four eyed fragments of ourselves.

This is complex simple science
but you are the most gorgeous social science
because I’ve been treating each text message as an updated data entry
and each phone conversation as research on what smiles sounds like